That’s me, meeting my beautiful son Gage for the first time a little over a year ago. It was the first time that my life went from "should do’s", and "can do’s" ... and was replaced by a slew of "have to’s". It’s a part of becoming an adult. Becoming a man. Not an older child, but a responsible father and husband who HAS to work, pay bills, and support his family. At least, that’s the way it’s supposed to work.

My concern with so many in my age group (Hell, plenty of others that are much older than I am) is that the actual "men" are becoming more and more scarce. So many fathers of schlepping off their responsibilities in lieu of a good time, and so many "adults" aren’t too concerned about holding up their end of the anatomical bargain.

For example, today: I worked day turns, which means I had to be up by 4:30 AM (0430 for my military friends out there) and didn’t get home from work until about 3:15 PM (or 1515). My father needed help bailing hay, and so I went over to his house to bail hay. At about 7:30 PM (1930 ... I realize after starting the trend of doing this that it is a bit redundant, so from here on out, no more military times) I got home, showered, ate some left overs, and have held/played with Gage until ... ohhhh ... .fifteen minutes ago. Needless to say, I’m exhausted and need to go to bed: but first, I needed to write this post.

Not every person my age would put himself through a day like today. A day full of hard work, helping out family, and sore muscles. I’m not doting on myself or pissing and moaning about my day, don’t get me wrong. I’m simply using my day as an example of what adults do, and do quite often.

That’s also, not to say, that one has to perform physical labor to be a "man". A banker could just as easily be a man, but his long hours and sacrifice are of a different kind than mind (probably more mental and stressful, to be honest). And I know some college students who don’t even work who I consider "men", or "adults", because of their responsibility and leadership role taking abilities!

My point, after almost 400 words of rambling ... is that real men are starting to become more and more scarce, and part of the problem is this view that has been fed to my generation from society that we are still "kids". I’m sorry, but at the age of 18, it’s time for you to step up to the plate and start swinging! That’s not to say that your first job is going to be your dream career choice, or your first girlfriend is going to be the person you end up marrying, but it’s important to take that teet out of one’s mouth and start venturing out on one’s own! Start learning some responsibility!

And now, with the latest health care bill ("children" can stay on Mommy and Daddy’s health insurance until they are 26 now! Awesome! Even MORE 26 year old children!) we are again being told that our children don’t have to grow up and figure this crap out. It’s disturbing.

Let me throw a hypothetical scenario out there. I’m almost 24. I’m married, have one child, and another on the way. I could, theoretically, have FOUR extra people on my fathers health insurance. Not to mention my sister, brother, and mother! How, again, are premiums supposed to go down?

On top of that, it’s disturbing the number of "adults" who:

• don’t have a job, and haven’t been serious about looking for one
• still live with their mom and dad (college students excluded, of course)
• don’t show up to work, if they HAVE a job
• can’t change a tire
• don’t care to learn how to change a tire
• don’t pay their own bills
• [fill in blank here]

Now I’m not saying that I’m "Mr. Manly McManster" here or anything. I’m not suggesting I can chug ten beers and smash all the cans on my forehead while playing football and lifting weights all at the same time. To be an adult, a "man" as compared to a "boy", requires so much more, and quite frankly, more than I could even type tonight! It’s caring for your wife when she’s having morning sickness and missing your favorite TV show. It’s continually taking the stroller in and out and in and out and in and out of the car while going around to garage sales. It’s helping your 50 something year old father bail hay because he needs the help, it’s showing up to work and making money to support your family, it’s making hard decisions and, when times are tough, eating Ramon so that your wife can have something better. It’s seeing your son being born, and not being able to stop yourself from crying, because you never thought that you could love anything so much, and then making a pledge to always be there to take care of him.

It’s having morals, not cheating on your wife, it’s ... so many things. Yet none of the above things may be YOUR things. And I don’t claim to be perfect. My wife tells me I can lose my cool sometimes and get angry (especially at stupid people), and though I can hardly believe it myself (as the sarcasm drips from the computer screen), I’ll take her word for it and address the issue.

To all the men out there, I hope that you take your life roles very seriously. I hope that you are true "men", not just grown up "boys" who can vote, be drafted, and buy cigarettes.